JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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