Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Randomize