You'll put your fingers inside me but you won't be my FB friend?
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
