we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
