Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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