I only kidnapped one of them. chill
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
