he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
Randomize
