Porn is love you can see.
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
