Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
