i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
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