his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize