32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
you never un-have a 4some
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
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