i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
