But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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