or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
Randomize
