God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
