David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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