Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Drake has all the answers
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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