Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
can we get vodka so I have an excuse for being an emotional wreck
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
Randomize