if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
