No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Randomize
