I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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