We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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