make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
