brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
