Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
