Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
