Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Randomize
