Is it normal to miss your booty call?
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
