I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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