My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
