its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
You did what with his pubic hair?
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