omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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