She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize