we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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