Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
