hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I wish our county sheriff had a comment section for their mugshots.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize