1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I would ride that face into the sunset
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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