Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
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