How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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