Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Text me some of your sweat
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