Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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