I wish I only lived at night.
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
