ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
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