I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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