True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I take back everything I said about communal showers
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Two words: blizzard sex
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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