my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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