So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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