he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
