Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
