He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize